The Ants

A week before the classes were to end, I got a very special surprise from one of my kindergarten students. One morning, Gavin came up to me very excited. He said, "I have something for you! I have something for you!" Thinking that he's discovered my "addiction", I was hoping to get a bag of chocolates from him. While he was getting that "something" from his bag, I looked at his class teacher and raised my eyebrows silently asking her if she knew what it was. She just giggled and said, "Yes, he has something for you!" Gavin finally came back and gave me that "special something" - ants.

I laughed out loud and lovingly said "thank you" to Gavin. It was so funny, there I was expecting a bag of chocolates but what I got was a plastic of ants, 2 big black ants to be exact. I hugged Gavin and proudly showed the plastic of ants to his classmates. I saw how proud he was of himself. He even offered to explain that those ants were "guard ants". For me it didn't matter what his gift was, the thing that mattered was "his heart" when he gave it to me. I will always treasure Gavin's gift to me.

This made me realize how God must feel for us. He must feel much love for us when we try to do things for Him. He treasures everything that we do even if these things may be very feeble. Most of the time we fail in our endeavors, but I know that He still lovingly looks at us and tells us that He appreciates our efforts. 'Cause He doesn't look at the whats of our efforts but He looks at the whys of our efforts. The only thing that He wants from us is a relationship with Him not our ministry, not our accomplishments, not our worldly successes. He wants all of our heart, not just a part of it but ALL of it. So the next time that we go to God and try to do things for Him, we have to remember that it doesn't matter what we do or whether we succeed or fail 'cause He will always be like a father to us. He will always be proud of us 'cause He knows our hearts.

Completely (from Facing the Giants)

The secret of life is letting go
The secret of love is letting it show
In all that I do
In all that I say
Right here in this moment

The power of prayer is in a humble cry
The power of change is in giving my life
And laying it down
Down at your feet
Right here in this moment

chorus:
Take my heart
Take my soul
I surrender everything to your control
And let all that is within me lift up to you and say
I am yours and yours alone
Completely

This journey of life is a search for truth
This journey of faith is following you
Every step of the way
Through the joy and the pain
Right here in this moment

Right here, right now, and for the rest of my life
Hear me say

I am yours and yours alone
Completely

Prince Caspian

(with Irene and Yola at TP Mall)

I've waited for this movie since last year. I finally got to watch it for free last Wednesday, thanks to my school. There were about 200 of us from Mawar Sharon (church and school). Anyway, the movie wasn't what I expected. I expected it to be "grander". But then, it doesn't matter, I still loved it cause it's Narnia. I'm a die-hard Narnia fan. Go, Narnia!!!

I just hated the part where Prince Caspian and Susan kissed. I didn't think it was necessary. The movie would've been better off without it. But then, it's Hollywood, what could we expect. :-(

Anyways, I got three things from the movie:

1. I have to be passionate about what I do. (Reepicheep and his troop)
2. Be proud of my work.(Again, Reepicheep and his troop)
3. Anything that I do, I do it for God! (When they finally figured out what they were fighting for. That it was all for Aslan.)

Hurray for Narnia! Hope they make another Narnia movie. :-)

Abiding...Not Striving (James Hudson Taylor)

Last week, I was reading a book about Hudson Taylor and his wife Maria and a chapter in the book struck me as something so true...and so liberating.


From Chapter 20 of the book "Hudson and Maria, Pioneers of China" by John Pollock.

He (J.H. Taylor) opened and skimmed through letter after letter from the stations, from home, from Shanghai.

He came upon one from John McCarthy, written a day or two after Hudson had left. It was a long letter. He read on and on, attention riveted. "I seem," McCarthy wrote, "as if the first glimmer of the dawn of a glorious day has risen upon me... I seem to have sipped only of that which can fully satisfy." McCarthy had found the secret they sought. Hudson looked at the letter again. "To let my loving Saviour work in me His will...Abiding, not striving or struggling..."

Hudson came to the last paragraph. "Not a striving to have faith, or to increase our faith but a looking at the beautiful one seems all we need. A resting in the loved one entirely, for time, for eternity. It does not appear to me as anything new, only formerly misunderstood."

Hudson was amazed at his own blindness. His eyes opened wide. As in Barnsley twenty years before, as at Brighton four years before, a long inward struggle resolved in a split second. "As I read it, I saw it all. If we believeth not, He abideth faithful. And I looked to Jesus and saw (and when I saw, oh, how joy flowed) that He had said, "I will never leave you." In shorter time than it took to describe afterwards, Hudson grasped that e must not struggle to have the strengthand peach of Christ. "I have striven in vain to abide in Him. I'll strive no more. For has not he promised to abide with me - never to leave me, never to fail me? The effort to 'get it out' was a mistake.

"I am one with Christ," he cried as he explained the glorious discovery to the whole Chinkiang household, hastily gathering them together and reading McCarthy's letter. "It was all a mistake to try and get the fullness out of Him, I am part of Him. Each of us is a limb of His body, a branch of the vine. Oh, think what a wonderful thing it is to be really one with a risen Saviour." And in some such words as he wrote a few weeks later to his sister Amelia in England, he expounded the truth he had missed so long: "Think what it involves! Can Christ be rich and I poor? Can your right hand be rich and your left poor? or you head well fed while your body starves?"

Wow! It's just so amazing to know that God is always there ready to guide us, ready to help us. We just have to abide in Him. He promised never to leave us nor forsake us. It just gets so tiring when we struggle to abide in Him thinking that He abandons us when we are unfaithful, but then we don't have to struggle 'cause He is always there... He will never leave our side. :-) Life in Him is always bountiful 'cause everything that is His is ours too. We have everything that we need to fulfill our destiny, we just need to abide in Him.

Shining Like Stars

My friends and I 'stole' this little boy a few days ago. His name's Raka and he seemed so comfortable in our house. Raka is just one of the many kids who play outside our gate every day. Right after moving to the new staff house, I felt a burden for the kids in the neighbourhood. I knew that I can bless them by teaching them English. However, I didn't know who to approach or ask for help about starting the ministry.

Last month, Ms Lina, also a teacher in MSCS, told me that she was planning to start a ministry in our neighbourhood and she was wondering if I could help. Immediately I said yes. I knew that this is an opportunity for me to be a blessing. I was excited. We started our English class 2 weeks ago. The children are always excited, very eager to learn. It is such a joy teaching them. :-) I am so grateful that God has opened the door for me and my friends so we can shine like stars in the darkness.

Gibby

I met Gibby at a children's revival meeting last week. My friends and I were jumping up and down during praise and worship when he suddenly appeared in front of us and showed us the 'right' moves. I couldn't help but laugh coz he looked so adorable and funny.

I took pictures of him while he was dancing. But he came to me and asked me to erase them coz he said he didnt want me to take pictures of him. He tried to look shy. But then, after a while it didn't really take much prodding to have him pose and smile in front of the camera. :-) I'm glad I met Gibby coz I was reminded that life was just so simple. And there's always lots of reasons to smile.

Humility in Service

"For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many."

Mark 10:45

We had our Easter celebration yesterday and all the students prepared a short presentation. The Kindergarten 1 students presented a skit on Jesus washing the feet of His disciples. It got me thinking about the reason why I am in ministry. I was convicted because most of the time I serve people only because of want of recognition or praise, and not because of love.

A few weeks ago, while reflecting on my life, I realized that I am always eager to please people. I want people to praise me, whether it be from my family, friends, boss, colleagues, pastor, co-workers in the ministry, it's all the same. I want them to praise me for the things that I do. I feel important when I am needed. I draw my value from my achievements, from the approval of men. I am on a spiritual high whenever people are applauding my efforts.

But Jesus came to Earth to save us because He loved us. He didn't need the approval of men because He was secure in the Father's love. He served people because He loved them and not because He wanted them to like Him. That is what I'm trying to do now, learning to serve like Jesus. I have a long way to go but at least I'm trying . :-)

Some thoughts on Valentine's Day :-)

It's Valentine's Day and I got 3 candies from a boy. Isn't it exciting! I got myself a Valentine... It's just that this boy is just about 4 ft tall and he's way younger than me. Hahaha. :-)

This morning I asked my Kindergarten students to watch a video about perseverance. As they were going in to the computer room (which we also use as a video room), I quickly reminded them that they were to get a chair right away and sit quietly while I prepare some stuff. While most of the kids said 'yes' without a fuss, I noticed a kid not paying attention to what I was saying as he was busy getting something out of his pocket. I was about to reprimand him for not paying attention when he suddenly reached out his hand and said, "for you".

I was speechless for a moment 'cause I saw in his right hand some of the candies that he got from the Heart Pinata. I was teary-eyed seeing that I was the recipient of such selfless giving, and to think that I was just 1 second away from reprimanding him. I felt like I didn't deserve it. He was supposed to keep all of it for himself just like what any other kid would normally do. But then he decided to give some of it to me. It was just so sweet. :-D

I was then reminded of God's love for me. Every day he shows me how much he loves me but then I'm too busy to notice. I'm so preoccupied with a lot of things that I deem to be much more important than intimacy with Him. I'm too busy to hear Him telling me how much He loves me, too busy to see that He has given everything to me.

Oh that I would always see

God's great love for me.

In big things or in small,

I will always listen when He calls.

Oh that I would always be His friend,

and run with Him 'til the end.

O how I love you, Lord!

Intimacy with God

(Grade 2 students praying)

God has been so patient with me. I've been telling Him that I will spend more time with Him in devotional prayer but I keep on delaying. I always say that I will do it tomorrow. But the tomorrows were just piling up and I still haven't fulfilled my promise to him.

As a teacher, I emphatically tell my students that they have to learn to pray and read the Bible on a daily basis. One day as I was getting ready for class, I just felt so empty. It was like all my strength was sucked out of me. I saw a picture of me teaching and as I was talking 'something' was pulling things out of my spirit. Then I realized that every time I teach, there is something that I give away in the spiritual. I remember when I was in college a pastor in my church said, "you can't give what you don't have". I knew that I just had to repent. I felt so tired and it was all because I kept on giving when there was very little in me. I was so busy looking for ways to serve Him when all He wanted was for me to seek intimacy with Him.

I praise God for His great mercy. 'Though I am unfaithful, He's still faithful. I fail Him many times but He patiently waits for me to rise up and start anew.

The prayer below is from Passion for Jesus by Mike Bickle. I made it to be my personal prayer as I long to know Him intimately.

O Lord, we have seen just a little bit of Your splendor and majesty. The beauty of who You are and what You do is capturing our hearts like a lovely, irresistible fragrance. From this point on I want my life to be one unbroken journey of progression in holy passion. Draw me, Lord. Draw me to your glorious self. I don't want to be at a distance. I want you, no matter what it costs me. Draw me Jesus, and I will run after you! Amen!

A Blog to Commemorate UP's Centennial Celebration

(A pose at Acad Oval on my last visit to UP)

On the night of my 16th birthday, I was ready to leave for Dumaguete to apply for college in Silliman University. I was all set, all my bags were packed. Amazingly, I heed my father's advice and decided to go to UP instead. For months, he's been asking me to choose UP instead of Silliman. He said that it would be better for me to attend college there. I kept on saying no because I felt like Quezon City seemed so far away. But I don't know what came over me that night coz I said "yes". And I'm glad I did! My UP days were some of the best days of my life!


I met a lot of great people in UP! I learned a lot of things in UP! I grew closer to God in UP! UP is the best!!!



Here is a blog to commemorate my alma mater's centennial year.
UNIVERSITY OF THE PHILIPPINES
http://www.upd.edu.ph/

1. ANO'NG STUDENT NUMBER MO? >> 95-48521 (alala ko pa!)





2. ANO ANG FIRST CHOICE MO NA COURSE?>> BAA...Gusto kong yumaman... :) Kaso di ako nakapasa



3. SECOND CHOICE? >> ComSci



4. ANO COURSE MO NA NATAPOS? COLLEGIO?>> BS HRA (CHE)



5. NAG-SHIFT KA BA? >> Yes



6. SAAN KA NAG UPCAT? >> WMSU, Zamboanga City



7. NAKAPAG-DORM KA BA? >> Yes, Kalayaan and Kamia and tabi ng Yakal :-)



8. NAKA UNO KA BA? >> Yes.



9. NAG-KA 3 KA NA BA? >> Yes - Chemistry



10. LAGI KA BANG PUMAPASOK SA KLASE? >> No! Lalo na pag 7 ang class.



11. MAY SCHOLARSHIP KA BA? >> STFAP for some sems. 12. ILANG UNITS NA ANG NAIPASA MO? NAGING CS OR US KA BA?>> All of them. Hindi ako naging CS or US.



13. NANGARAP KA BA NA MAG-CUM LAUDE? >> Minsan nangarap din.



14. FAVE PROF >> Madami...Nat Sci 2 Geo Prof (forgot his name), Prof Guggenheim, Prof Tingzon, Prof Tumacruz



15. WORST TEACHER: >> History Professor, can't remember his name



17. WORST SUBJECT: >> PE - Defense for Women -- lagi ako pasa-pasa and I had to wake up really early



18. FAVE BUILDING: >> The main lib.





19. PABORITONG KAINAN: >> Beach House, sarap ng bbq!



20. NUNG ESTUDYANTE KA PA MAGKANO BAANG BINABAYAD MO SA JEEP?>> 1.50



21. LAGI KA BA SA LIBRARY? >> Yes!!!



22. ILANG BESES KA BUMOTO SA STUDENT COUNCIL? >> Twice...i think.





23. MAY CRUSH KA BA SA CAMPUS?>> Yeah… madami… 24. ANU-ANO ANG MGA NAGING PE MO? >> Table Tennis, Camping, Defense for Women and Bowling



25. KAMUSTA NAMAN ANG BLOCK NYO? SINO UNA MONG NAKILALA?>> Masaya ang block namin. Sheryl Mercado was in Kalayaan dorm so I usually went to class with her.



26. MEMORIZE MO BA ANG ALMA MATER SONG NIYO?>> UP naming mahal… pamantasang hirang... Hindi ko na-memorize :)



27. SUMALI KA BA SA MGA RALLY?>> I joined the EDSA 2 rally pero naka-graduate na yata ako nun.



28. KUMUHA KA BA NG SATURDAY CLASSES? >> Yes. No choice. Most of the major subjects in HRA were only on Saturdays.



29. ANO ANG ORG/FRAT/SOROROTY MO? >> UP VCF, UP Navs, UP DCF, UP Jambangan, Applicant sa UP SHARP :)





30. NAG ENJOY KA BA SA UP?
>> Super!!! Ang saya!